Religious Holidays, chocolate, and I'm going to Hell.

I'm the first person to admit that if there IS a hell, I'll be working on my tan down there, hanging with Hitler, chillin' with Caesar.. I'm sure there'll be heaps of interesting people and where there's people there's food and goddamn do I love me a good buffet. 

I do lots of things that would earn me my room down there. I'm 25, unmarried and living with two guys. The last time I saw the inside of a church was one that had been refurbished into a Pancake Manor. I spend hours on my appearance every week. I have a massive online presence and am incredibly self aware. I don't donate to charity as often as I could or should. The list goes on and on.. However, I feel like the absolute coup de grace has to do with religious holidays and the way I choose to celebrate them. As such -- for ease of access [assuming the G man exists and wants a bit of a cheat sheet] -- I figured I'd share with my audience the way I celebrate the [few] religious holidays I even know about.

1. Easter [and thus inspiration for this post]. Easter has something to do with Jesus becoming a Zombie in a cave as far as I know and as far as I know there wasn't ANY chocolate involved [Zombies eat brains not bunnies, duh] and yet my method of celebrating this holiday is by gorging myself on Cadbury Creme Eggs and eating bunnies ears-first. Depending on the year I'll also add in a generous sleep in [not this year though, Top 100 Songs of the 90s!!].. which I feel MIGHT redeem me, since before Jesus apparently became a Zombie he was dead.. and death is kinda like sleeping.. right? Winner?

2. Christmas. I know a little bit more about the religious side of Christmas but I'd be lying if I said 90% of my knowledge didn't come from Christmas Carols I heard The Wiggles singing during Carols in the Domain. So apparently, baby Jesus was born in a stable because Mary and Joseph didn't book ahead and just expected there to be a room available on Christmas Eve. I mean, really? Anyway, some old dudes came and gave some super weird gifts [what the hell even IS Merr?], a little drummer boy played his drum [which I don't understand EITHER because every baby I've ever met has been super sensitive to noise, not to mention new mothers who are a whole nother species as far as I can tell].. and yeah, that's about it.

As far as I can tell we're supposed to go to Church Christmas Eve [or that's what was happening in Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, anyway..], then again Christmas morning, and then again later in the day.  We're supposed to pray and eat bread and sing songs and spend time with family.

Now, what ACTUALLY happens is that I spend months leading up to Christmas spending money I can't really afford on presents, gift wrapping them for vanity sake, planning my outfit and makeup [also for vanity sake]. I watch Carols in the Domain Christmas Eve [which I guess is kinda like Church so maybe a winner there], I wake up and eat bacon and eggs and then open/give presents. Once I've made a huge mess of the living room, I take a nap til lunch when I wake up, gorge myself some more, get drunk and .. honestly the rest of every Christmas since I was 18 is a blur so I'm not sure what happens after that point.

Welp.

I just spent 10 minutes sitting here trying to think of another religious holiday and while I'm sure they exist I can't remember any, so lets just say that if there ARE any I probably abuse them in much the same manner as the above.

In conclusion, assuming there is a G-man, and a Hell. I'd like a room with a view, and if possible I'd prefer not to have to share with anyone. Thanks in advance!

xx. A.

Captains Log, Stardate 43198.7.

I'm really not sure where to start today, it's been a while since I've actually done a journal-format blog and it seems it is incredibly easy to fall out of practice! 

Life has been such a rollercoaster the last few weeks I really don't know where to start. It's incredible.

- I started sleeping REALLY badly.. I'd hear a bump in the night and that was it, no more sleep for me. I was averaging around 2 hours sleep a night. It was rough.

- My job contract was coming to a close.

- I'd applied for another job in the same building which I thought I had a fairly good chance of getting but was passed over for it.

- Money was tight, I didn't get paid one week because of a fail at paperwork.

... just a culmination of all those things AND more meant I was slowly getting more and more depressed. But suddenly it was as though I hit an upswing and BAM! -

- The job I'd applied for became available again and was I was picked!

- I went to dogsit at a friends house and suddenly I could sleep again, convincing myself that it was the dogs who made any weird noises I heard.

- I lost 5kgs since the start of this month!

- Karen and Neil got back [yay!] and brought me an AWESOME Captains hat from on their cruise ship. It is 12:15am and I have still yet to take it off. Best. Hat. Ever.

- Pokemon Black and White came out finally! Aaaah I'm such a geek.

.. Anyway I realise that's not actually a lot of good things but honestly just the job thing has made me feel as though this immense weight has been lifted from my shoulders. It's a fairly short contract - only two months-ish - but there's a chance of extension and it's a learning experience so it will make my resume look much more attractive. On top of that, it means I can stay in Brisbane!! I had almost resigned myself to the fact I'd be returning to Sydney with my tail between my legs in the near future, and while I would dearly love to spend some time with James, I really wanted to make this work.

So yeah.. life is good right now. There's still lots of stress and uncertainty, but I can say at the very least, this has been a good week and I am sleeping so much more soundly for it.

I can't be bothered typing anymore cause I kinda wanna go sleep [seeing as I can do it now!] so here's a photo montage of the last few weeks! Not even a little bit in order cause I cbf.. 

xx. A

Busy life is busy!!

Wow, I can't believe I haven't written for the entire month of February! My dad just sent me a Facebook message saying "How's it going" so I guess that means I am more than overdue for a new blog!

Soooo, life! I've been slowly recovering from the trauma placed on my body last year. I'm getting every cold, flu, infection, etc under the sun, but I'm also -- very slowly -- starting to have more energy, having less 15-hour-sleep marathons, starting to get out and do things with my friends.. honestly? I'm feeling great!

I made a promise to myself, toward the end of my radiation, that I was going to start to 'live life' more than I ever have. And while I've definitely been taking it one step at a time, I'd like to think I've been having a fairly solid crack at it!

I've been working almost everyday [with the exception of staying home to nurse whatever cold, flu, infection, etc my lack-of-immune-system hasn't protected me from this week] which has led to me feeling a lot more productive and pulled me out of the almost-depression I was in. My work life is amazing. I love my boss, I love my job. I love the people who work with me [mostly..]. I feel as though this is a place where I fit in, and I am appreciated. Some days I have to drag myself out of bed, force myself to shower and almost crawl to the bus stop, but by midday - after an hour or two - I feel better just for BEING there and DOING something other than sitting in bed feeling sorry for myself and whatever illness I have this week.

I've also been getting out a lot! Last weekend I stayed at my twin, Karens house and had an absolute blast. Hours upon hours of shoe/clothes shopping [I managed to not buy anything, but I lovelovelove being a fashion consultant! haha] in a mall that is quite literally bigger than my hometown. Lots of geeking out. AIR CONDITIONING. Sushi Train, Wagamamas, MEXICAN FOOD! Seriously, this woman feeds me better than any person on the planet ever has [except maybe my dad, who makes a wicked baked dinner].

This weekend I went to a BBQ at Karens boyfriends sisters, who I'll be house sitting for while they all abandon me in favour of a 2 week cruise to New Zealand and back! I'm really looking forward to it because - once again - AIR CONDITIONING! woohoo! haha. But yeah, BBQ was amazing - great food, great wine, great company! We ended the night off watching a few episodes of The Mentalist and playing a spot of WoW.

Then, last night I went to the Albion Comedy Club for Karlees birthday. One of the comedians was only 17 or so and was discussing the various rites of passage into manhood among different cultures. He joked that last week he had opened a jar of salsa in ONE TWIST and therefore, among Australians, was now a man. I almost wet myself. Maybe you had to be there. Anyway it was going quite well and I was enjoying a fabulous meal of Beef and Guineas [spelling?] pie, mashed potato & salad, when the power to the ENTIRE BLOCK went out! We waited about 45 minutes and the room gradually got hotter and hotter to the point where makeup was literally running down peoples faces in little rainbow rivulets. Eventually the announcer got up and said that the show had to be cancelled but gave everyone free tickets to come back another night. All in all, not too bad and I got 2 tickets when I had only originally paid for 1. Score!

Anyway this blog has definitely been all over the place. I'm off to do a bit of cleaning seeing as my room was spotless last weekend and in just 5 days is covered in clothes again.. typical. Anyway, here are some pictures from the last few weeks!

xx. A.

Bits and bobs.

I was going through my blog - updating it for the new year - when I found this draft of a post.. not sure why I never posted it, but it's from about November I believe. None of it is relevant anymore but there's some pretty pictures so I thought I'd make it public.

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So the last few weeks have been a bit of a blur for me. I sleep when I'm tired [which is always, to be honest] so my days kind of smush into eachother and before I know it a whole month has passed! That said though, I'm trying to do more with friends -- life is short and even though I feel like crap right now, I don't want to die tomorrow knowing I spent today alone when I could've done something with someone I loved instead.

Anyway there's no way I could write details about every single social occassion I've been to in the last little while -- I'm not that bored and I'm not that motivated -- instead I have just a little bunch of photos which I think sum it up nicely. =]

xx. A.

Everything else.

The problem with having a public 'diary' is that the public see it [funny that]. It becomes a place to share photos, and funny anecdotes, maybe let your family know how you're doing without having to contact them all individually.. but it really does stop being a place to tell the truth on every level.

I'm mad at someone. I've been mad at this someone for a long time, but the last few days in particular have made me significantly more upset. I feel justified in my anger, I believe with all my heart that they are in the wrong and I am in the right. But I respect this person [maybe not respect, misplaced loyalty perhaps?] too much to call them out on a public platform and so I'm going to write about something else, instead.

It's 2011! I want to be the kind of person who believes in a new year being a whole new beginning -- giving me the chance to be a whole new person, but lets face it, I'm far to cynical for that kind of behavior. I'm not the kind of person who makes new years resolutions but given what I've been through and the things I have overcome in the last 6 months or so, I really feel like a few changes would do me a world of good. Maybe not new years resolutions -- more like, "beat cancer and that scared the shit out of me and I've realised I'm not actually invincible and life doesnt go forever" resolutions.. or BCATSTSOOMAIRINAIALDGF resolutions for short. haha.

BCATSTSOOMAIRINAIALDGF Resolutions -- 01/01/2011, 3:11am.

- I will read more [books, computer stuff doesn't count].
- I will spend more time with the people I love.
- I will spend less time worrying about people who 'should' care not caring.
- I will get more sunshine!
- I will eat better, exercise more, and in general respect my body.
- I will pay off my mountain of debt.
- I will not complain about not having any 'play' money while paying off my mountain of debt.
- I will cut unnecessary bad influences from my life - people, objects and addictions.

There's a few more but they're mostly sort-of repeats or personal, so they'll be quietly filed away under "LOL SIF ANYONE CARES ANYWAY".

In unrelated news I just returned from almost a week in paradise.  Ok, not quite paradise - but pretty damned close. I was staying with my Dad in the Hunter Valley and I swear, he should start charging for accomodation - his house is like a resort.. Pool [the swimming kind], darts, pool table [the kind you're normally drunk while you play], gorgeous views, the whole nine yards..  I did very little more than lounge around by the pool, eat delicious food that I didn't cook [haha yay!], hang out with my brothers, play scrabble and read, for the entire week I was there.. so so good. =]

Here are a few pictures -- the week was really too great to ruin with words.

Anyway that's more than enough for tonight,
xx. A.

Oh and I did it!

I totally cut my hairs too!

What do we think?! Fringe is a go or no? I'm loving it, personally!

xx. A.